Failed Cooking Tutorial: Edamame

How in the world
     do you mess up Edamame?!
{... you get lazy that's how! }

I was hungry the other night,
& so for a last minute snack
I decided I should try edamame.

Super awesome for you,
natural, good source of lean protein,
& time consuming to eat.
PERFECT.

I hadn't cooked it myself before
so I read the directions on the back.
They told me to put some
in a microwave safe container,
           with a microwave safe lid
& to heat on high
         for approximately 7 minutes.

I was unaware that
       you can eat Edamame
{two} different ways.
         Crispy or Soft.

I was counting on the soft version
           so you know where this is going.

I put about a cup of edamame
       in a microwave safe bowl
                but didn't have a lid,
so I flipped a plate upside down
                    && used that instead.

Seven minutes later
my microwave was smoking,
my kitchen smelled like burnt, bitter food
& I had to throw away my {quick} snack
leaving me stranded for another
{five minutes} at least to try and
not burn another batch.

Okay, Round #2:

half the time...
Three minutes and thirty seconds.

FML.
Burnt again.

From now on I'm sticking to the stove top,
& waiting patiently for my edamame,
so my microwave doesn't stink
three days later,
& half my bag doesn't go in the trash.

To properly cook Edamame:
Heat a small pot of water till boiling,
add Edamame, & return to boil.
Cook for 3-5 mintues.
          drain & rinse with cold water,
    Enjoy your full bag of Edamame
                            :)

A Cardboard Box.

Cardboard boxes are always useful
&& If not, they can be recycled.
            {How nice...Okay continue...}

They're used to
store shoes, hold groceries,
used to mail special packages
& get supplies to soldiers.

Used as bins for toys,
art canvas,
or maybe home for a hurt animal.

A hat, a sign,
a halloween costume,
or a seat.

In this case,
             A box,
           looks just like
                       a box.

But not your ordinary
                                 box.

A play place.
A house.
A rocket ship.
A hiding place.
An imaginary fun box.

Or..

All of the above.

A box is a childs playground
& this Home Depot box
provided a good
twenty minutes of entertainment
 for
       Baby Bella.

Thank the Lord for the little things in life
                                 <3

Finish this sentence, "Cell Phones..."

"... are always threatening their own lives
     when in my possession."

AKA
I'm really hard on cell phones.

I always {accidentally} drop them.

          But after Miss Baby Bella
sogged up the unlock button
      {so my backlight had to always stay on
            therefore forcing me to carry a car charger
                                && wall charger at all times}

& THIS HAPPENED...

I decided I needed a new one.

No. I didn't throw it.
It decided to commit suicide
& literally bounce out of the cup holder
of Baby Bella's stroller.

Dear Phone,

I'm sorry I was so hard on you.You will be missed dearly but replaced by a much nicer twin with a slick otterbox case & heavy duty screen. {I thought that was overkill, apparently I learned another lesson the hard way}. Your battery and memory card will still be of assitance however as a handy back up when this new phone decides to take a dump. Not to mention you still work perfectly, well kinda. Thanks for hanging in there for a whole 4 months.

Sincerely,
    Momma who needs phone insurance.